I’m an ass. I complained about my pants being too tight, and how I wanted to lose weight because I can no longer pull my 20-year-old-sizes up over my thighs (for the love of GOD, I am 46!). All my life I was petite. I ate whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted. I never gave a second thought to pizza, or loaded fries, or ice cream, or that whole Entenmanns’ Thick Fudge Golden Cake I devoured one late night in college. I can hear those of you who weren’t as lucky telling me to shut. The. Hell. Up.
Ya’ll don’t have to say it - I can hear the collective groan and a massive SHUT THE HELL UP!
I think what really got my attention was seeing a friend yesterday who was struggling with her weight and it seems she’s doing everything right and getting nowhere. And I stood there commiserating. And then I left, and felt like a complete ass. Would she have told me to shut the hell up? Maybe inside her head she was looking at me and thinking, bitch – will you just shut the hell up! because she really wanted me to shut the hell up and just leave but we have never talked to each other like that and it wouldn’t be right to start a war over something stupid with someone who’s not your best friend who would just laugh you off and then eat a pan of brownies with you.
I’m going to try to stop obsessing over my weight, or – at the very least – stop posting about it. And before you yell at me again to shut the hell up! I want to emphasize that if we are doing all the right things – eating sensibly, exercising regularly and/or daily, drinking minimally (or not at all) – then aren’t we really doing all we can do?? Short of seeking medical intervention? Shouldn’t it be enough to be healthy from the inside out?
Another friend said what matters most is the size of your heart. Nothing is truer. And you know what else? Some of the nastiest people I’ve met in my life were skinny people. And church goers. Not all church goers, but that’s another post and has nothing to do with food. Well, except for the sacrament, but one nugget of bread and a wine chaser is not going to turn you nasty. Unless you went to church without breakfast and you’re crabby because you want to get to the coffee and donuts. Which really sounds like poor planning on your part, but who am I to judge?
I am hereby… shutting up.